


Black Swan

by howlsmovingiceskates



Series: Trespass Series [2]
Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Mob, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Angst, Brief Mention of Suicide, Established Relationship, F/M, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Hyungwon is the godfather, Mafia AU, Minor Character Death, Nightmares, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Panic Attacks, Soulmate AU, do not copy to another site, it's time for revenge, just the oc's, mentions of previous trauma, no beta we die like men, this is a mafia au so please read with caution
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-05
Updated: 2021-01-15
Packaged: 2021-03-07 21:54:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 11,839
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26834764
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/howlsmovingiceskates/pseuds/howlsmovingiceskates
Summary: Sometimes, some people can’t handle the idea of another’s happiness. Sometimes those people are those who were once close to you.
Relationships: Chae Hyungwon/Original Female Character(s)
Series: Trespass Series [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1424995
Kudos: 14





	1. Runway

“Do we really have to go to this?” Hyungwon asked, watching from the bed as you slipped into your dress. 

“You’re the one who told me to do this.” You pointed out, turning your back to him. “Zip me?”

There was some ruffling as he got off the bed and came to stand behind you. 

“I know. But now that I’m thinking about it, it’d be better if we don’t go.” He said, zipping up your dress. He ran his hands over your shoulders, gliding them down your arms and letting them rest on your hips. His lips came into contact with your neck, pressing a soft kiss to your skin.

“Why not? If I go, I can tell them I’m done, that I’m going to work overseas then they’ll stop pestering me.” You put your hands over his. 

“Yes that is true. But selling your apartment would also get them to stop.”

“Yeah, but the lease still has another year, and it’s the only thing keeping my dad at bay.”

“We can break the lease.”

“Not legally.”

“Darling we’re the mafia; there are no laws for us.” 

“My father’s name is on the contract.”

“I keep forgetting about that.”

“Yes I know, I keep reminding you.” You turned around in his arms, standing on the tip of your toes and placing a quick kiss on his lips. 

He reacted quickly, snaking his arms around your waist and pulling you against him. His lips crashed against yours seconds after you had pulled away, kissing you with a deep passion. You placed your hands on his chest, taking a hold of his tie and tugging out from underneath the vest he wore. 

You slowly pulled away, biting his lower lip before completely cutting contact. “I need to do my hair, then we can leave.” You told him, patting his chest before spinning out of his arms. 

“You’re really such a tease, you know that?” He grumbled, fixing his tie.

“Oh yes. I am more than aware.” You winked at him, walking out of the room. 

You went into the bathroom and stared at the mirror, wondering what hairstyle would look best with the dress. It was a floor length, midnight blue dress, nothing special about it except for the sleeves and the built in belt. The long sleeves were made of lace and sewed into them were patterns of flowers. Since they exposed your arms, you had to cover up your scars. The last thing you wanted was to be questioned about them, or accidentally glance at them and start to panic. You also had to cover some things on your chest because, while the v neck didn’t extend far enough to expose anything, it still gave the opportunity for a rather large scar to peek out. 

In the end, you decided that simply curling your hair would suffice. There was no one to make an impression on; the only one being Hyungwon, but that’s another story. You could wear a trash bag and he would still be impressed with you.

“We’re going to be late, my dearest.” Hyungwon said, poking his head into the bathroom.

“Yeah yeah yeah, hold on just a second. I’m almost done.” You replied, letting the last lock of hair fall loose from the curling iron. You took a brush to your hair, softening the curls and making it look less of a mess.

“Damn.” Hyungwon whistled, “You’re stunning.”

“Yes, we are all aware of your enchantment with Y/n.” Changkyun said as he walked down the hall.

“Doesn’t mean I can’t vocalize my thoughts.” Hyungwon countered.

“No, but you also don’t have to make it obvious you want to fuck.” Changkyun retorted.

“Changkyun!” You shouted, heat rising to your cheeks, “Stop!”

“Sorry.” He said insincerely.

“Ignoring him, I’m ready to go.” You told Hyungwon, stepping out of the bathroom. He smiled at you and took your hand. When you walked into the garage, you stopped, “What car should we take?” You pondered out loud. “We should look really expensive.”

“Somebody wants to show off.” Hyungwon chuckled.

You shrugged, “I want to show them that I don’t need them like they think they do.” 

“In that case, let’s take the lamborghini.” He grabbed the keys off the hook on the wall, putting the keys to the Chevy Cruze back. 

“You’re excited to drive now, aren’t you?”

“Oh yes.”

“Try not to speed, Dear.” You said, walking to the car and getting in the passengers side.

“You’re letting me drive the lamborghini and you expect me not to speed?” he asked incredulously as he got into the driver’s side.

“Yes. Just because we can break the laws doesn’t mean we have to all the time.” You cajoled.

“Why not?” He whined, opening the garage and starting the car.

“Because it’s a hassle explaining to the authorities that it was us, and if they don’t let us get away with it, then we’ll take everything they’ve ever loved away from them. It’s a burden.”

“Fine. Whatever you say love.” He held out his hand, wiggling his fingers as he waited for you to accept the gesture. You wordlessly took his hand, settling into the seat for the long drive.

You had been invited to a sort of reunion banquet. People you once studied with decided that a get together at a fancy hotel was a great idea, and wouldn’t leave you alone about it. They were always trying to get into your business and know what you were up to in the field of psychology. 

You decided to bring Hyungwon with you for a variety of reasons: one, you didn’t want to go alone; two, you were sure everyone else would be bringing their soulmate; three, he was your rock and would keep you from making snarky comments out loud for everyone to hear; four, it was a rarity to see him out in public without a face mask; five, he looked damn good in a suit.

“It’s really hot when you drive with one hand.” You blurted out, ogling your husband. “The reddish purplish hair just adds to it.”

He cackled, glancing over at you. “You could take a picture you know.” 

“Yeah, but that would mean I have to take my eyes off you, and I don’t want to do that.”

“I hate to break it to you Love, but you’ll have to take your eyes off me because we are here.” 

“Damn.”

He pulled in front of the valet of the hotel, putting the car in park. He got out of the car as the valet came over and opened the door for you. You thanked the man, walking towards Hyungwon, who was pocketing the ticket. He held out his arm for you, so you took it. 

Together, you walked into the hotel shrouded in confidence and elegance. You told the staff at the front that you were part of the psychology banquet, and they directed you to a room in the back. It was strange because the second you walked into the room, everyone stopped and looked at you, conversations halting. 

“I don’t think they were expecting such a great looking couple.” Hyungwon whispered in your ear. You bit your lip to keep yourself from laughing.

“Y/n,” Someone said, walking towards you. “I’m surprised you came.”

You smiled, “I did say I would, didn’t I?” 

“Yeah, but none of us have seen you in years!” They exclaimed. “I see you’ve found your soulmate. Hi, I’m Kim Namjoon. Y/n used to study together. What’s your name?” He bowed towards Hyungwon, who returned the gesture.

“I’m Yoo Seung Ho.” Hyungwon replied. It was hard not to break into laughter at the made up name. He only used it because he knew that was the name of your current favorite actor.

“Oh like the actor?” Namjoon questioned.

“Yes, exactly.” Hyungwon affirmed.

“Y/n!” A shrill voice called your name. You cringed, immediately placing the owner of the voice. 

“Ji Ah!” You exclaimed, faking excitement. 

She started to go for a hug, but then she saw who you were holding onto and stopped. “Ooh, who’s this hotty?” She asked, batting her eyes.

“This, is Seung Ho, my soulmate.” You said, looking up at him to already see him smiling down at you. It was crazy how he still made your heart skip a beat.

“Damn girl, you got lucky.” She said, pulling you out of your daze. Ji Ah was never your favorite person. She always annoyed you and gave you headaches. Not to mention she was obsessed with how people looked. 

“Darling,” Hyungwon said, “why don’t we go get some refreshments?” 

You were thankful for the excuse to be pulled away. “Alright, we’ll talk later Ji Ah, Namjoon.” You waved, letting Hyungwon take you away from them. “Thank you.” You said quietly, letting go of his arm only so you could grab a plate. “Wanna share?”

“Sure.” He shrugged, putting his hand on the small of your back.

“Let’s get some strawberries, cookies, crackers and cheese…” You mumbled to yourself, naming each type of food you put on the plate. There was quite a bit of food, all ranging from dinner to dessert to snacks. You were sure that there was too much food for all the people that were present to eat. There was a variety of drinks too, but Hyungwon didn’t bother with the more extravagant drinks as he grabbed you both a bottle of water. 

The room looked just like a typical ballroom. Chandeliers hung from the ceiling, tables lined the perimeter, couples danced in the middle, and an orchestra played in the corner. There were no special decorations set up, after all it was a rather small event. It was kind of sad. You’d expect more from psychology majors. They should know that in these kinds of events, the people in attendance are deciding their actions through the peripheral route of processing rather than the central route. Especially since there was no clear message being spoken. 

Much to your dismay, you didn’t get to sit alone at a table. Every single one had at least one person sitting, so you did a quick scan and found an old friend. You guided Hyungwon to the table, setting down your plate while he pulled a chair out for you. You smiled in silent thanks, jumping a bit when your friend called your name. “Y/n! Hi! It’s been forever since I’ve last seen you!”

“I know! It’s been too long.” You tried to sound eager.

“Damn you should’ve called me. We could’ve met up sooner.” She said, “but anyways, introduce me to this lovely man.” She turned her gaze to Hyungwon. 

“Sierra, this is Yoo Seung Ho,” you took his hand in yours, lacing your fingers together, “Seung Ho, this is Sierra. We used to hang out.” 

He nodded his head towards the female, “It’s very nice to meet you.” He said politely. 

“And you’re soulmates?” She asked, looking between the two of you. 

“Yes, we are.” You confirmed. 

“Finally! I was worried you wouldn’t find each other! When did you meet?” She perked up, finding the conversation more interesting now. 

“Umm...three and a half years ago?” You looked towards Hyungwon, who nodded in confirmation. 

“Oh! You’ve been together longer than Soobin and I have.”

“You found your soulmate?” 

“Yeah, she’s over there talking to Ji Ah…” she trailed off, “I better go save her.” She waved and left you with Hyungwon. 

You picked up a strawberry, studying it before eating it. “You’re not enjoying this.” Hyungwon said, taking a strawberry for himself. 

“No,” you agreed, “it’s all bland, they’re fake, I’m never going to see them again.”

“Remind me why we’re here.” He rubbed his thumb along your hand. 

“Because it’s the only way to get them to leave me alone for the rest of our lives.”

“We could always just kill them.”

“That’s not ethical.”

“No, but it’s also not impossible.”

“While that’s true, I don’t want to be the one responsible for their death.”

“I’ll respect that.”

“You better.”

“Hey, I’ve got an idea.”

“What…?” You were almost scared to find out what it is, considering you had just been talking about mass murder. 

“Let’s dance.” He suggested, “it looks like people are making their way over here, and I’m sure you don’t want to talk to them and neither do I. They won’t bother us if we’re on the dance floor.”

“But...food…” you said lamely. 

“Finish your food first Love, I’d rather you eat than dance.”

“You’re supposed to be eating this with me.” 

He plucked a grape off the plate and popped it into his mouth, causing you to roll your eyes at him. “You told me to help you eat it all.” 

“Are these seats taken?” Someone asked, interrupting your conversation with Hyungwon.

“Uh..no. They’re not.” You said, turning your attention to the newcomers.

“Oh! Y/n, hi! I didn’t recognize you. You’ve gotten skinnier.” The person pointed out. 

Hyungwon straightened up, subtly putting his hand on your knee under the table. He knew that comment hurt you, that it instantly brought up everything you desperately wanted to forget. You put your hand over his and tried to smile at him, though you were sure he could see right through it.

“I’ve lost some weight, yes. How’ve you been Si Ho? You and Joohyun doing well?” You asked to guide the conversation away from you.

“We’ve been amazing! We just had a baby, the nanny is at home with her now.” You were told, “Is this your soulmate?”

“Uh...yes, this is Yoo Seung Ho; Seung Ho, this is Si Ho and Joohyun, they both study psych.”

Hyungwon briefly bowed his head towards them both. You could feel him rub his thumb in circles on your knee; you were grateful for the distraction. 

“It’s a pleasure to know that Y/n won’t be alone her whole life. We were starting to get worried that she was just color blind. Though for awhile we thought Youngjae was the soulmate. By the way, have you heard from him? He kinda just, disappeared” Joohyun said.

You laughed his hurtful comment off, feeling the need to get away from these people. Si Ho was relatively nice, Joohyun was not. “Well, Seung Ho and I were about to go dance. It was nice talking to you.” You stood, prompting Hyungwon to do the same.

“Wait! We should hang out sometime.” Si Ho suggested.

“Actually, we’re leaving overseas tomorrow.” You lied, taking the arm Hyungwon was offering you.

“Well, when you get back then.” Si Ho sounded hopeful.

“We won’t be back. I got a job in America.” You informed.

“Oh...well congratulations. Make sure to stay in touch.” The couple waved bye as Hyungwon pulled you to the dance floor. 

It was odd. Most of the couples didn’t seem to know how to dance, they kind of just awkwardly held each other. It was depressing to see that so many people weren’t in complete sync with each other. Maybe it was the atmosphere, or maybe it was because they had just met, or maybe they just didn’t click. Either way, it was sad to see them together. 

Honestly you didn’t understand what this whole thing was anymore. Was it a dance? Was it a dinner? Whatever it was, it was poorly coordinated. No one you would have truly liked to see was there. Except Sierra. She had always been the most helpful. 

Since no one else was trying to do more than sway about the room, Hyungwon and you decided to keep it simple, not wanting to stand out already more than you were. You wrapped his arms around his neck, while his went around your waist. “How are you feeling my Dear?” He mumbled, speaking close to your ear.

“I could be better.” You confessed. “I knew they were rude, but their comments took things a bit far.”

“It’s okay Sweetheart. Soon you’ll forget all about what they said to you.” He tried to soothe.

You grunted in response. 

“How much longer do we have to stay here?” He muttered. 

“My guess is we can slip out after a half hour.” You replied, sighing. 

“Didn’t you want to show off how rich we are, and that you didn’t need them anymore?” He questioned, catching your eye and holding it. 

“Yeah.” You nodded. 

“We can’t do that unless we leave around the same time they all start to file out.” 

“That’s true.”

The two of you circled the room, simply holding each other and forgetting the world. This was supposed to be a social gathering, but no one talked, and the ones who did were the annoying ones. Everyone seemed to be engrossed in their own world -especially Hyungwon and you. 

Sometimes you could feel people staring, watching your behavior, not that it could do much. You weren’t in your natural settings, and you had been reminded of your past; you weren’t acting like your usual self.

Maybe they were jealous. Jealous because they weren’t confident in themselves; jealous because they could only reach the basic tier of bonding. They were jealous of you. You could almost laugh because the tables have turned. They were always trying to help you with everything; now they were intimidated by you.

After awhile, when you were beginning to grow tired, you placed your head on Hyungwon’s chest. You were secure in his arms, free to ignore the world around you. It was like no time had passed at all while you were in your little bubble.

“Can we go now?” You asked quietly.

“Yes. I was wondering when you’d ask that.” He replied, halting your movements.

“Then why didn’t you say anything?”

“Because this is your thing. Not mine.”

“Whatever, let’s just go.”

“Yes Dear.”


	2. I'll Be There

Walking out of the ballroom with your arm linked through Hyungwon’s was a great feeling. It felt like you were saying goodbye to everything you once were, so you could finally grow to your full potential. You were officially letting go of your past and welcoming the future.

Many other people were waiting in the lobby as the valet’s were getting their cars. Hyungwon kissed your cheek as he stepped outside to let the valet know you were ready. As he left, Sierra and her soulmate came up to you. “Man, you’ve got yourself quite the guy.” Sierra commented.

You crossed your arms over your chest, smiling as you watched Hyungwon run a hand through his hair as he talked with the valet. “Yeah. Yeah I do.” You agreed.

“If you don’t mind me asking, what level is your bond?” Soobin asked, her arm around Sierra’s waist.

“We’ve reached the third tier.” You informed. “Why?”

“Damn. It’s just-” She stopped, seemingly trying to find the right words, “the two of you really stood out against everyone. It’s obvious at first glance how bonded you are.”

You shrugged, not really finding it a big deal. “I never really noticed.” 

The door to the lobby opened as a couple left and Hyungwon came in. The gust of wind was enough to make you shiver and hug yourself to keep warm. “It’ll just take a couple of minutes.” Hyungwon told you as he came near. You nodded, relieved that soon you would be able to go home.

He took his suit jacket off and wrapped it around your shoulders, prompting you to slide your arms through the sleeves. “Your jacket is warm.” You commented.

“That’s why I gave it to you.” he told you.

“Seung Ho,” Sierra started, grabbing Hyungwon’s attention, “what do you do for a living?”

“I run a business.” He answered, “I tend to the people’s needs.”

Both girls looked impressed. “Honestly, I was expecting you to say you model.” Soobin voiced.

“I’ve had a few offers.” He allowed, glancing out the glass doors. “Darling, our car is here.” 

“We’ll see you later.” Sierra said, waving goodbye.

You simply smiled and waved back, not feeling the need to tell them that this would likely be the last time you saw each other.

As you left the building, you could hear a few impressed whistles as people noticed the lamborghini sitting out front. You smirked, satisfied with the reactions of your peers. You thanked the valet as they opened the passenger door for you, getting inside quickly. Hyungwon got it at the same time you did, and as soon as he was buckled, he took off.

“Don’t ever call yourself Yoo Seung Ho again.” You begged.

“Why not?” He questioned, laughing.

“Calling you Seung Ho felt weird on my tongue. It doesn’t fit you.” You explained.

“Well then what should I call myself? Lee Minho? Park Seo Joon? Park Hyungsik?”

“Out of all those, Hyungsik would work the best.”

“Why?”

“Because of the ‘Hyung’ in the name.”

“It’s too close to my actual name though.”

“Then why’d you suggest it?” 

“Because you like him.”

“Whatever.” You huffed, letting silence fall between you.

As you watched the scenery pass, you started thinking about what Si Ho and Joohyun said to you. Were you still noticeably skinny? You thought you had gotten it all back. Sure you were still a little under what you used to be, but was it really that noticeable?

And of course they had to mention Youngjae. Youngjae, who kidnapped and tortured you, who made you into who you were today. Him being dead wasn’t enough for you. You wanted to raise him from Hell and make him suffer.

“Y/n,” Hyungwon began after a while, interrupting your thoughts, “how’re you feeling?”

“Why do you ask?” You turned your head to look at him.

“You’ve been quiet, and I know you’re thinking about what those people said to you.”

You sighed, “I feel like shit. I just wanna go home and sleep.”

“You never finished your food. Did you wanna stop and get something or just go straight home?”

“Can we just go straight home?”

“Of course. When we get home, you go take a shower while I get everything ready for bed, okay?” He reached over and laid his hand on your thigh, giving it a reassuring squeeze. 

“Okay.”

It wasn’t long after that when you got home. You were quick to get out of the car and go inside. Before going to the bathroom, you made a quick stop to your room to pick up clothes.

Shutting the bathroom door felt like you were closing yourself off from the world, like you were putting yourself in solitude. You contemplated locking the door, but you felt that was going too far. You didn’t want to push Hyungwon away. 

Setting your clothes on the counter, you went and turned on the shower. You dropped Hyungwon’s jacket to the floor, then struggled a bit to unzip the dress. It fell to your ankles and soon your bra, tights, and underwear joined it. You stepped into the shower without a second thought.

The warm water felt amazing on your skin. It cleansed your body, while also cleansing your mind. You reached for the shampoo first, squeezing a nice blob onto your hand and lathering it in your hair to rid it of the hairspray you put in. Next came the conditioner, which you let sit in your hair while you washed your body and face. 

Your shower was over far too soon. You were tempted to get back in and just sit on the floor, but that would prompt Hyungwon to investigate, and you didn’t want him to worry any more than he already was. So, you grabbed the hoodie you put on the counter and slipped it on, underwear and sweatpants following. You gathered your previous clothes up and opened the door, walking across the hall to your room.

You hadn’t bothered trying to brush out your hair. It was too much effort for the time being. Besides, nothing world ending could happen from you not brushing your hair for one night. When you walked into the room, the first thing you noticed was Hyungwon sitting against the headboard of the bed. He was dressed in a loose, thin T-Shirt and sweatpants; a stark contrast to how he was dressed when you last saw him. His hair was beautifully messed up, certainly from him running his hands through it nonstop. Speaking of his hands, he held them up behind his head, supporting his neck. He gazed at you, patiently waiting for you to join him.

The second thing you noticed was the two mugs of hot chocolate sitting on the nightstand beside him. The whip cream that topped them was melting because it was so hot. The thought of the drink made your tastebuds water. 

The third thing you noticed was the candles he had set up around the room. The small flames danced about, providing an almost romantic feeling to the room. The shadows moved as the flames did, and a lavender aroma filled the space. Hyungwon must’ve gotten the candles from your box of things to relax with, you realized. 

You threw the clothes into the laundry hamper, eyes glancing around the room as you moved towards Hyungwon. He picked up a mug and handed it to you, “Hi.” he said softly, grabbing the other mug for himself.

“Hi.” You replied, staring down at the mountain of whip cream.

“How are you feeling?” He asked, reaching a hand up to touch your cheek.

It was times like this when you wished you could lie. It was impossible to keep how you were feeling from him, especially when he could feel it too. He only ever asked how you felt so you could share your thoughts. He didn’t need to otherwise. Often times you found that talking with him made you feel better. That’s why he always gently prompts you to talk to him when he knows you’re feeling down. “I’m okay. I guess.” You mumbled, sipping on your drink.

He didn’t press any further, knowing you needed some time. He let his hand fall to his side as he too sipped on his drink. The silence wasn’t uncomfortable, but it wasn’t your favorite thing in the world. You let the silence shroud you and give you an excuse to be a recluse. You stared down at your hot chocolate as you sipped it, while Hyungwon stared at the wall, waiting for you to speak to him.

When you finished your drink, you licked your lips and handed the cup to Hyungwon, who quietly placed it on the nightstand. You laid on your back, closing your eyes and taking a deep breath. You could feel his eyes on you, taking you in.

A couple minutes passed with no action, no movement. But suddenly you felt him move to lie down next to you, his hand moving along the waistband of your sweatpants. It was a comforting gesture, one that told you he was there. His hand slid under your sweater to rub your stomach in small, gentle patterns. His touch was warm, not cold like it usually was when he did this. It was probably because he had been holding the hot chocolate this entire time.

He pushed the sweater up, exposing your stomach and scars to him. Seconds later, his cool lips came into contact with your warm skin. “You’re hiding.” He mumbled against your belly, placing small kisses on your stomach. 

You grunted, acknowledging that his statement was true. You were hiding. You couldn’t deny that. “How’d you know?” You whispered.

“Because,” he rubbed your sides while he continued to kiss you, “You took a half hour in the shower, you’re wearing my hoodie and sweatpants, you’ve barely spoken a word, you won’t look at me.” With each piece of evidence came a kiss.

You were silent, not sure how to respond. He knew you too well. He had given you time, and now he was coaxing you out of your thoughts. “It’s okay Baby,” He murmured, “it’s okay.” 

He held you by your hips, massaging them as he peppered kisses in small areas around your stomach. You figured it out then, when you realized his kisses weren’t random. He was kissing your scars. He hadn’t kissed you like this in awhile, not since the beginning stages of your recovery. 

You weren’t able to stop the tears from spilling, or the sniffles that came with. Hyungwon quickly picked up on this, and moved to comfort you. His body half covered yours as he moved up to kiss your tears away. One leg rested between yours as he used his knee to support his lower body, his right forearm resting by your head and his left hand by your shoulder to support his upper body. “Baby, talk to me,” He pleaded, his left hand coming up and pushing the hair stuck on your forehead away. “Tell me what’s wrong, so I can help you.”

You brought your hands up to cover your face, attempting to hide yourself from him. Of course, he knew better than to let you cave into yourself completely. He tenderly pried your hands away from your face, kissing each palm as he did so.

“You’re okay. I promise, you’re okay.” he kissed down your cheeks and around your face, taking your tears away from you. He was doing his best to physically take the demons away, and he was successful. For someone who could lash out at any given moment because his men didn’t get anything, he was an incredibly patient and nurturing soul. 

You wrapped your arms around his neck and pulled him onto you, disrupting his balance so his body crushed yours. His arms wrapped around your back as he held you close to him, letting you finish getting it all out of your system.

“I love you, Y/n.” he whispered in your ear. 

You’re emotions were raging inside you. You were sure he could feel how much sorrow was swirling within, how much anger thrashed about, how much love overshadowed it all. You could feel how much his love poured through the bond, how much warmth and light burned from his care, and how much patience danced across the clouds of your storm. His calm emotions tried to blanket themselves over your wild ones. 

He kept you safe encased in his arms, not once letting go lest another demon try to make its way to you. The words he whispered in your ear fought the existing beasts, pushing them back to the dark recesses of your mind and locking them there. He protected you in every way he could, not once stopping until he knew you were safe.

“Hyungwon.” you choked out.

“Yes, my Love?” he answered.

“I’m not okay.” you cried.

“What’s wrong, Baby? Speak to me.” He urged, sitting up just enough to see your face.

“I can’t get what they said out of my head.”

“What who said?”

“Si Ho and Joohyun. And I keep seeing Youngjae’s face everywhere. I feel- I feel-”

“Breathe Sweetheart, breathe.”

You tried to do as he said, tried to match your breathing to his. You could feel his heart beat against your chest, somehow perfectly in sync with your own. 

“There you go. Just breathe.” He whispered. “How do you feel?”

“I feel like the world is crashing around me, and I can’t stop it.”

“Give me some of that weight.”

“No. No, I can handle it.”

“Darling, let me take that burden off of you. Share it with me.” He implored

“I should’ve died a long time ago.” You breathed.

“No. No, you shouldn’t have.” He prompted you to look at him. 

“Yes. I should have. There’d be a lot less problems if I had.” You stared at his nose.

“Y/n, haven’t I told you what happens when someone kills the soulmate of a mafia leader?”

“You have…”

“What else are you thinking?”

“That I’m tainted.”

“How are you tainted?”

“The scars that riddle my body show how weak I am. I’m ashamed of who I am, what I look like.”

“I think you’re more ashamed of what you look like than who you are. You’re a confident woman Y/n.”

“How can you be so sure?”

“Because you quite literally radiate confidence. You’re more confident now than you were before you were kidnapped.”

“I’m sure my brother would be able to find my weak spots.”

“Does your brother have something to do with this?”

“He has everything to do with this.”

“How so?”

“He’s gone. He’s still out there. He’s the one who whipped me, who cut me, who laughed as I cried, who destroyed me. He’s out there and we can’t find him.”

“Sweetheart, it’s only been a couple of days since we found out he disappeared. We’ll find him. Don’t worry.”

“Are you sure?”

“I found you, didn’t I?”

“You took your sweet ass time doing it.”

“But I still found you.”

“Yes, you did.”

“What scars make you so ugly?” He let go of you then, moving to his original position. “Is it this one?” He asked, kissing the biggest scar on your side. “Or is it this one?” He kissed another, smaller one, on your stomach. He pulled the sweater off your body, exposing all the scars that scattered your upper body, leaving nothing hidden. “Could it be this one?” He asked, kissing your shoulder.

“It’s all of them.” You whispered, staring up at the ceiling. Hyungwon’s face was suddenly above yours, blocking your view.

“All of them?” He asked, staring into your eyes for clarification.

“Yes. All of them.” You confirmed.

His lips were suddenly on yours, capturing them in a delicate, passionate kiss. Your arms flew around his neck, holding him in place. He touched you as though he was saying a prayer with your body, his hands reverently ghosting across the scars he could reach. He knew where each one was, you realized. He knew the map of your body, and he was prepared to love every part of it. He was prepared to help you come to terms with everything. You dug your fingers into his hair and melted into him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Honestly this is probably my favorite chapter from this universe. I love it so much


	3. By My Side

Everything that could’ve went wrong, went wrong. He could feel your concern blossoming in his chest, but he pushed it back. He couldn’t focus on that right now. Because right now, YG was attacking, and he needed to get his men out of there, fast. Of course it was the one time he didn’t have Shownu with him. 

The meeting had been going fine until the shots were fired. Glass shattered and the shouts of men rang through the air. He was glad you weren’t with him this time. If you were here, the situation would be ten times worse because it’d give YG information that could be used against him.

The first guy to attack Hyungwon was shorter than him, but appeared to have more muscle. He threw a punch at Hyungwon, who swiftly dodged it. Hyungwon was able to grab a hold of the man’s arm and twist it, producing a sickening crunch as the arm broke. Now that he had his enemy distracted, he brought out his knife and plunged it into the man’s stomach. He pushed the guy back, causing him to stumble and fall to the ground. 

The next guy that came to Hyungwon didn’t stand a chance because he had already thrown the knife into the guy’s head. Two down, plenty more to go. YG outnumbered his and his partner’s men combined. It was supposed to be an easy trade off. New weapons in turn for protection. Easy. All he had to do was collect the weapons and shake the hand of his ally and promise protection. That’s why he brought with him some of the newer recruits, so they could get experience. 

His men fought back, each taking on a man for themselves. Compared to YG’s men, their moves were rough and uncalculated. Something to expect from people new to the field. He needed to do something before they were killed. Since taking his knife out the guy’s head would take too much time, Hyungwon pulled his gun out from its holster on his side and began shooting.

One man dropped dead to the ground as Hyungwon fired a bullet into his spinal cord. Taejoon looked at Hyungwon, a look of relief on his face before he bolted out of the room. Before Hyungwon could say anything, Taejoon was shot and dropped dead to the ground. That was the final straw for him. He had to get everyone out. Now.

He shot at every one of YG’s men. Sometimes missing, sometimes hitting his target spot on. He pried a guy off Haejin and snapped his neck, shoving Haejin towards the door. Someone approached him from the right, so he shot them in the head without hesitation. 

A bullet grazed his arm, but that didn’t stop him. He’s been through enough to not be fazed by a bullet ghosting his arm. In return he shot his attacker with the last bullet in his magazine. He pulled out a new clip from his belt, dropping the old to the ground as he inserted the new. 

YG’s men seemed to think they’d lose the fight if they kept going, so they abandoned ship and ran back the way they came. Hyungwon followed, slowly walking in their direction and mercilessly firing bullets at their backs while they ran. 

Once they were too far away to see, he let his arm fall to his side and shoulders slump. This wasn’t how tonight was supposed to go. “H.One,” Haejin called, jogging up to him, “we lost Taejoon and Hyunjin. And uh...the boss from the other group...he died too.”

“Shit.” Hyungwon cursed, running a hand through his hair. It wasn’t noticeable, but this action caused blood to streak in his hair. “What’s the body count?”

“Thirteen. Including our own.” Haejin answered. 

“Fuck. Let’s gather up the bodies, then burn them.” He declared, walking back to the battle scene. “We’ll take care of our men, YG can come clean his mess himself.”

“To clarify, we’ll burn our men’s bodies but not YG’s?” Haejin asked.

“Yes. We owe it to them to not simply leave them to rot. They deserve a crude cremation at the very least” He replied. “Taehyung, go out to the van and get the gasoline and matches. Seojoon, notify your leaders that your boss died.” 

“Yes sir.” They said in unison.

Hyungwon helped Haejin and Sookyun carry the bodies outside. Haejin and Taehyung were the only ones left on his team. Seojoon and Sookyun were part of Minho’s team. He definitely needed to look out for them now; at least until they can sort themselves and appoint a new leader. No doubt he died protecting his own two men. 

Hyungwon directed everything, showing what to do with the dead bodies. Taehyung came back with the gas and a box of matches, handing them over to Hyungwon. He was silent as he poured the gas on the bodies, a solemn look on his face. 

Guilt and regret raged through him, no doubt something that could be felt by you. He tried to ignore your growing worry, focusing on the job at hand. He lit a match and dropped it to the ground, setting everything ablaze. He stood and watched as the bodies burn. It was Taehyung who pulled him out of his trance, putting a hand on his shoulder and announcing they needed to leave.

He slowly walked to the van, taking his sweet time getting into the driver’s seat. The drive back to the warehouse was completely silent. No one dared to speak as they knew the severity of the case. When they got to the warehouse, the van was unloaded and everyone went their separate ways. Taehyung going out to one of the clubs, Haejin to the shooting range, and Hyungwon to you.

The second he opened the garage, he saw you waiting for him. You looked exhausted as you uncrossed your arms and made your way towards the car. He felt bad for making you wait so long, and for not bothering to call you. He took a deep breath as he exited the car.

The first thing you did was hug him, for which he was thankful for. He wrapped his arms around you tightly, putting his chin on the top of your head. “Is this your blood?” You asked quietly.

“No. Not all of it.” He answered, tightening his arms around you.

“Come on, let’s get you cleaned up.” You started to pull away, but he wouldn’t let go of you.

“No. Not yet. Let’s just-let’s stay here for a little while longer.” He whispered.

“Okay.” You agreed, holding him close.

The both of you stayed in each others arms for what felt like eternity. Hyungwon didn’t want to let go of you. He clung to you like a scared child would cling to its mother. It was a rough night, one he wasn’t mentally prepared to deal with.

Eventually, you forced him to let go of you and dragged him inside the house. You lead him into the bathroom, turning on the shower and instructing him to get in while you get him a fresh change of clothes. He watched as you left the bathroom, waiting until the door closed to start moving. Slowly he stripped himself of his weapons, setting them on the counter while his clothes dropped to the floor. 

He stepped into the shower, relishing in the warmth of the water. He stared at the ground, watching as the blood ran off his body and down the drain. He took the bottle of body wash and squeezed some on his hands, scrubbing away the dry blood. 

His left arm stung, the water being the first cleaning its had since he was injured. He decided to leave it be for now, he’d take care of it later. His main concern was getting the blood that did not belong to him off his body. He barely heard the door open and close again as you came back into the bathroom.

“Did you rinse off?” You asked.

“Yes.”

Seconds after his reply, you turned off the shower, letting the water drain completely before plugging the drain and turning the water on to fill the tub. “Good, you’re taking a bath.” You declared, pushing the shower curtains to the side. “What happened to your arm?” 

“I got hit by a bullet.”

“I wish you told me sooner, so I could’ve gotten the supplies while I was out. Sit down, and I’ll be right back.” You commanded, once again leaving.

He sighed and slowly lowered himself into the rising water. He had a hard time relaxing, the memory of what happened just hours ago still replaying in his mind. He could’ve prevented the deaths on his side. 

You came back minutes later with the large box of medical supplies. You set it down on the ground while you sat on the edge of the tub. “Show me your arm.” You demanded, gently speaking. He lifted his arm up, which you grabbed and put in your lap. 

He watched as you studied the injury, reaching down to grab cotton balls, tweezers, and a saline wound wash. You wet the cotton balls with the saline, using the tweezers to hold them. Gently, you dabbed at the injury.

“Do you want to talk about what happened?” You pressed softly, reaching over to turn the water off once it completely filled the tub.

“Taejoon and Hyunjin died.” He explained, “Seoyoung, the other leader, died too.”

“Oh.” You stopped what you were doing, looking up at him. “What about Taehyung and Haejin? Were they hurt?”

“No. They’re fine. They’ll probably have a few bruises, but they’re fine.” He answered.

“What happened?”

“YG. I think he was more after Seoyoung and I than our other men.”

“Could he be trying to take you out since you’re the leader? So that the gangs and everyone under and relying on you, the are without guidance and go to him?”

“It’s possible, but if he wants me dead he’ll have to try a hell of a lot harder. He’s never had the brightest strategies. Remember when I told you how he tried to out me to the public by causing a stir in the area to get reporters on it? Still think that was his stupidest strategic move. Wasn’t the worst though.”

“What was the worst?”

“Taking you.”

You grunted, going back to cleaning up the bullet wound. “Was that his move, or was it Youngjae’s?”

“It was both. Youngjae chose to kidnap you, YG chose to keep and torture you.”

“You won’t need stitches.” You told him. “We’ll just have to keep it clean and wrapped up for a few days and it’ll be healed soon. Especially since you’re not going to do anymore deals for awhile. I won’t bandage it until you’re done with the bath.”

“Okay.” He said, closing his eyes and letting his head fall against the wall. 

He felt you pour water into his hair, clearly trying your best to keep it out of his face. The next thing he felt was your hands in his hair, scrubbing at his scalp with shampoo. He did his best to concentrate on your fingers in his hair rather than the images flashing behind his eyes. 

You poured water over him again, rinsing out the shampoo. Next you put in the conditioner, letting it sit there as you began to wash his body. You started with his left arm, since it was closest to you. Then you scrubbed his chest and back, moving him around as you needed. He didn’t try to fight your actions, giving you all control over him. 

He barely registered you pulling the plug to drain the water. Before you made him stand up, you wrapped his arm up in a dry bandage. You dried him off, helping him into sweatpants and a sweatshirt. “I think I might go for a walk.” He told you, pulling the hood over his head.

“Okay. Don’t stay out too late.” You leaned up and pressed a quick kiss to his lips.

He gave you a brief smile, grabbing his phone off the counter and walking out of the bathroom. He made a quick pit stop at your room to get his earbuds and face mask then left the house.

He played depressing music as he walked aimlessly around. He could’ve saved their lives. They didn’t have to die. If he was more competent, better at his job then they wouldn’t have died. The same thing happened with his mom. She and him were out on a simple drug mission when they were attacked. She died because he couldn’t protect her. Days after her death, his father committed suicide, leaving him in charge of the mafia as the only heir. He was seventeen then. He’s thirty now. It’s been over a decade and he still hasn’t learned how to protect people.

Hell, he couldn’t even protect you. You were taken from him and nearly died. If he was a day later in rescuing you, you probably would have left the world. If he kept a better eye on you, if he never went on that mission, if he had stayed with you, you wouldn’t be suffering now. You wouldn’t still be dealing with panic attacks and the occasional hallucination. You’d be happy. 

Somehow, he managed to find himself in an empty park. He was quite far from the house, but that was okay. He could handle himself. A bench under a streetlamp caught his attention, and suddenly finding himself exhausted, he went to sit there. The moment he sat, he leaned over and put his head in his hands, elbows resting on his knees. 

He was a horrible leader, he knew. He didn’t deserve the loyalty he had. He couldn’t protect his men, so why did they still believe in him? He could hear his father screaming at him, blaming him for his mother’s death. He could still remember the way his bruised body ached the day after his father beat him for the first time. He could still remember walking into his father’s study and finding his dead body.

Of course, they weren’t even his birth parents. They had found him on the streets and took him in because they pitied him. His real parents left him on the streets because they couldn’t afford to have him. They died in a house fire not long after they abandoned him. 

His thoughts were interrupted by gentle arms wrapping around him from his right side. He knew it was you. It couldn’t be anyone else. Your touch is what finally broke him. His body shook with sobs, so you pulled him to your chest and held him. 

It’s been awhile since he last cried, so he used this as a chance to let everything out. He was a complete mess. Had there been any onlookers, they would have never been able to guess that he was a fierce, merciless mafia leader. 

“Come on,” you muttered, “let’s get you home and to bed.” You stood, getting him to stand as well. You wrapped your arm around his waist, supporting his weight as he heavily leaned against you. 

The walk home seemed a lot longer than he thought it would be. Maybe it was because he was so deep in his thoughts the first time that he never registered how far he walked. He was grateful you followed him. He would’ve had a hard time finding his way back by himself.

Upon arriving home, you brought him to your room and had him take off his sweater so that he was shirtless. “Lay on your stomach.” You instructed, pulling out a bottle of lotion from your nightstand. 

He did as you said, lying on the bed and closing his eyes. You climbed on the bed, sitting on his legs. “You were thinking about your parents again, weren’t you? That’s why you’re more upset about death than you usually are.” You stated, speaking softly. You squeezed a dollop of lotion onto your hand, massaging it into his back.

He groaned at the contact, the cold of the lotion contrasting with the warmth of his skin. “Yeah..I was.” He admitted, sighing as your hands kneaded his back.

“You were just your dad’s scapegoat.” You reminded, rubbing out a knot in his shoulder blades.

A quiet moan escaped his lips. “Was I really?”

“Yes. It wasn’t your fault.”

“It feels like it was.”

“Why does it feel that way?”

“Because, if I had been better, faster, stronger, I could’ve saved her.”

“I don’t think so. I think she wouldn’t have let you save her even if you could.”

“You might be right.” He sighed, hoping to let the subject drop. If he really looked at it, there’s no way he could’ve saved her. If anything, she saved him. But he still tended to blame himself.

“I am right.” You claimed, “You’re the leader of the largest mafia in Asia. You never bat an eye at towards the people on your hit list.”

“Mmm…”

“You’ve been thinking about your parents a lot lately. What’s brought this on?”

“I don’t know. I feel like I’ve been losing control of things, much like I did back then.” 

“Do you need me and Ki to take some of the work off you?”

“I don’t know.”

“Think about it, and let me know. I’ll do whatever you need me to. You need to relax.”

“Mhmm…”

“Relax my love,” you urged, “I can feel it in your back. Your stiff.”

“I’m getting there.” He moaned as you massaged the tension out of his body. Your hands were magical, always finding the right spots that needed tending to the most. Silence filled the room, the only sound being the occasional moan.

He was able to relax to your nurturing touch.Your delicate hands and quiet hums of reassurance was enough to lull him to sleep.


	4. What

“What do you mean I have to go?” You asked, pacing about the living room. 

“I mean, it’s been months since I’ve seen you, and I would like to eat dinner with my daughter.” Your dad said. 

“And you expect me to cancel my plans for tonight?” You we’re getting worked up. Hyungwon watched you from the couch, concern written on his features. 

“What plans would you have?”

“I don’t know, maybe a date night?!”

“Oh please, give me a break. That’s not important.”

“It’s important to me.”

Hyungwon stood up then, walking to you and wrapping his arms around you from behind. You stopped your pacing, leaning into his chest. 

“Am I not important to you?” You father asked. 

“No, you are. It’s just-“ you sighed, reaching up to pinch the bridge of your nose. 

“I’ll see you tonight.” He declared, ending the call. 

“It’s okay love, we can have our date tomorrow.” Hyungwon whispered in your ear. 

“I know. But it sucks because I really don’t want to see my dad.”

“You could bail out on him.”

“Mm...I could. Maybe I’ll see him for five minutes then ditch.”

“If you’re not out in ten I’ll come get you.”

You turned in his arms, putting your hands on his chest. “You know, next time you dye your hair, it should be dark blue.” 

“Oh? Why dark blue?” He asked, reaching up and pushing stray hairs off your forehead. 

“Because you would look hot with that color.” You answered. 

“Will you let me dye your hair purple?”

“One day.”

“I’ll go blue if you go purple.”

“Why purple?”

“Because you would look hot with that color.”

“Okay. Deal.”

“Do you have any other requests of me Sweetheart?”

“Yes. I request you kiss me.”

And kiss you he did. He gently pushed you into the wall, his hands holding your face. You clutched his shirt in your hands, arching your back into him. You sighed against his lips, encouraging him to kiss you harder. 

“Oh for the love of-“ Wonho started. 

“Dammit.” Hyungwon murmured, swiftly pulling away as you let go of his shirt. He shot a glare towards his friend, clearly not happy with the interruption. 

“Hey, this is fair game. You’re in the living room, I am not overstepping any boundaries by coming in here. If anything it’s you two overstepping your boundaries.” He defended. 

“Okay, but you should also make some kind of noise when you enter the room.” Hyungwon said. 

You rolled your eyes, “Sorry Wonho. We’ll go get a room.” You grabbed Hyungwon by his shirt and dragged him upstairs.

When it came time to meet with your dad, you tried to dress like you didn’t care, but at the same time tried to look nice for your date with Hyungwon. In the end, you wore black skinny jeans with a turquoise blouse. You wore a tattered sweatshirt over it, that way when you were done you could take it off and suddenly look spectacular. 

Hyungwon drove you to the restaurant your father said to meet at, promising that if you spent more than ten minutes in there he’d come to get you. You kissed his cheek before getting out of the car.

Walking into the restaurant, you looked around but couldn’t find your dad. Were you there before him? You would’ve thought it was impossible since you purposely showed up late. You looked at your watch, double checking the time. You were definitely twenty minutes late, so where was he?

You decided to ask the hostess at the stand if your father had shown up. “Hi, excuse me,” You said to get their attention, “is a man by the name J here?”

“Oh, yes. Right this way ma’am.” they said, guiding you through the restaurant. They brought you to a table with a young man, roughly around your age. Maybe a little younger. He was dressed lazily, like he had just woken up and thrown on whatever he could find first.

“Y/n?” He asked, standing up from his seat.

“Who are you?” You questioned, trying to figure out what was going on. Who was this man? How did he know your name? Was he a threat? Why were you brought to him when you asked for your father?

“Ah, I’m Daniel. Your father asked me to meet you.” He gestured for you to sit down in the chair opposite of him. 

You did, only because your curiosity was piqued. What was your father trying to do? Was your father anywhere around? You quickly did a scan of the room, noticing someone hiding behind a menu. Someone else was standing beside a plant, doing nothing. Another person looked as though they were enjoying a drink by themselves at the bar, but you knew they were watching you. Of course there were more people watching too. So he had eyes on you. Great.

“Can I get you something to drink?” A waiter asked, snapping you into the present.

“Uh, yes a water please.” You decided. If you needed it, you could throw it and use it as a distraction to get away. 

The waiter left you with Daniel, who was staring at you oddly. “You don’t look like you’re in need of a replacement soulmate.” He said.

“I’m sorry, what?” You were flabbergasted. After all this time was your father really trying to set you up with someone? Was he really trying to take you away from Hyungwon? You could remember when he was so eager for you to meet your soulmate, and now that you have he was trying to ruin him.

“Your father said you needed a new soulmate.” He reiterated, furrowing his brows.

“No. I do not. My soulmate isn’t dead. My soulmate isn’t some poor lost soul. My soulmate is waiting for me outside in the car.” You were appalled. After years of being left unbothered, this was happening. The worst part was that you couldn’t escape. No doubt the people watching would stop you.

“So, you don’t need someone?” He asked, raising his eyebrows.

“No. I do not.” You replied curtly.

“Then why would your dad ask me to help you out? He made it sound like you were born without one.” He informed.

“Because, he’s not too fond of my soulmate.”

“Why not?” 

“Reasons you don’t need to concern yourself with.”

“If your soulmate is waiting for you then why aren’t you leaving?”

“Because we’re currently being watched by five men associated with my father. There’s one trying to hide behind the menu, another has been standing by that plant for awhile. One is dressed as a waiter. Another is at the bar. The final one is acting as though he’s waiting for a table.”

“How did you figure all of that out? I would’ve never been able to guess.”

“I know my father, and I know how to keep an eye out for things.”

“Can you teach me?”

“Why would I teach you?”

“Because we’ll be seeing a lot of each other from now on.”

“Why would we be seeing each other?” His statement unsettled you. What made him think you’d want to see him? And what made your father think you’d answer his calls again?”

“Because you and I are going to be a team.” He said. The sentence was simple, but it was enough to remind you of Youngjae. This was too close to what happened with him. You mind started to go on hyperdrive as you tried to find a way out of this. Anything. Water wouldn’t be enough to get the guy by the door away, but that was the only thing you could think of. Concentrating on escape was impossible because you were concentrating on not hyperventilating. 

Somebody angrily grabbed your hand and pulled you out of the chair. You nearly broke their arm until you realized it was just Hyungwon. Ten minutes must have passed. Maybe less given the fact he probably felt how uncomfortable you were. He barely bat an eye at Daniel as he dragged you away.

He didn’t say a word as you practically jogged to keep him from ripping your arm out of its socket. He helped you into the car and got in the driver’s seat. “That wasn’t your father.” He finally spoke. 

“No. It wasn’t.” You agreed. You grabbed onto the handle above your head as Hyungwon sped away from the restaurant. 

“Who was it?” He was livid. You didn’t need the rage boiling in your chest underneath your calm to tell you anything about how he felt. The shake in his voice, his white knuckles gripping the steering wheel, the velocity of the car as he sped down the street -it was all you needed to know. 

“Someone named Daniel.” You informed, watching as the world zoomed by. 

“What did he want?” Hyungwon pushed. 

“To be a fill in soulmate.” You bit your lip, watching as his demeanor changed in less than a second. He swerved to the side of a road, coming to a sudden halt. The seatbelt pushed into your chest, blocking you from flying out the windshield and sending you back into the seat. “Hyungwon what the fuck?!”

“A fill in soulmate?” He turned to you, fury filling his eyes. 

“Yes. My dad enlisted him to replace you in my life.” Maybe you shouldn’t have spoken so harshly. Hurt flashed in his eyes and blossomed through the bond.

“And you stayed there? To talk with him? You didn’t even bother to leave?” He demanded, clearly doing his best to not scream his head off. 

“Yes. I stayed because there were five men, two of which easily positioned to prevent me from leaving. Yes, I talked with him. I told him my husband was waiting for me in the car, and that he shouldn’t listen to my father.” You defended. 

“Bullshit.”

“How can you call bullshit? There’s no way you couldn’t tell how confused I was, how scared I was.” 

He pinched the bridge of his nose, breathing in deeply, “Y/n, you have the ability to fight your way out, but you didn’t. Why?”

“I’m not doing this.” You unbuckled your seat belt, fumbling with the mechanism. 

“Not doing what?” He watched as you struggled with the seatbelt. 

“This. I’m not doing this.” You quickly opened the door and got out, slamming it shut. You stomped away from the car, heading anywhere but there. 

“Y/n!” He called, getting out himself. He caught up to you, grabbing your wrist and whirling you around to face him. 

“No!” You shouted, “Leave me be Hyungwon. Clearly you’re not seeing me as your soulmate right now, so until you can, stay the fuck away from me.” You ripped your wrist out of his hand, storming away from him. 

He didn’t follow, thankfully. You walked in a daze, not quite knowing where you were going. You ended up at a bus stop, getting on one bus and off another until finally, you found yourself standing in front of your apartment door. You sighed and pulled your keychain out of your pocket, finding the old key and unlocking the door. 

You slowly shut door, resting your forehead against it. Tears fell down your cheeks as you let go of everything you were holding back. You slid down the door until your knees hit the ground. You put your back to the door, hugging your knees as you cried. 

Daniel had said things so borderline close to things Youngjae said once upon a time. To go through that again…no. No you couldn’t. You’d rather die than be forced into a relationship you didn’t want. Your father was blind, he couldn’t see that you were happy with Hyungwon. His actions were unacceptable. 

Hyungwon’s actions tonight were unacceptable as well. He looked at you like you were one of his men. He was angry, you understood, but it was excessive. He didn’t even bother asking if you were okay, and that’s what hurt you the most. You’d think the person you shared a bond with would see past their anger to help you. 

He reminded you much of how you thought he was before you began to bond with him. A cold, emotionless man. He’s never acted like that towards you, so what brought that on? You couldn’t begin to imagine where it came from. 

When you stopped crying and wiped the snot from your nose, you forced yourself to get up. You sluggishly moved to the couch, laying on your side with a box of tissues and the tv remote clutched to your chest. 

You tried to hone into the bond, closing your eyes and bringing it to the forefront of your soul. He was far away, far enough to cause a dull ache in your chest. Granted the pain came from the way you parted, and partially from your crying session. 

Still, despite the distance, a deep regret settled within as you tried to read into Hyungwon. Great anxiety and distress washed over you in waves. He was searching for you. He’d find you eventually. Whether or not you were ready to see him would be a different story. 

You put on a drama, but you didn’t watch it. Instead you fell into a half sleep. You still processed everything that happened in the drama, from the queen trying to kill the princess’ soulmate, to the princess and her soulmate being married only to get death threats. Unfortunately, that meant you were awake enough to hear the rain hitting the window. You threw a pillow over your head to try and muffle the sounds. It was just rain, you told yourself. Rain. Nothing more. Nothing less. 

Someone pounded on the door, “Y/n!” It was Hyungwon. You didn’t get up, knowing that if you did the rain would become too much. The pounding itself was becoming too much. It stopped, fortunately. 

You heard the door open and close, Hyungwon’s heavy footsteps coming nearer. “Y/n.” He whispered, gently prying the pillow from your grasp and removing it from your head. His hands were freezing and wet. 

You opened your eyes, flinching at the bright light that greeted you. When they fully adjusted, you settled your gaze on Hyungwon. “You’re soaking.” You stated lamely, taking in the way his wet clothes clung to his body. His hair was dripping and so was his clothes. He was shivering like crazy. 

“I am.” He nodded, “but that’s not important.” He reached up and tenderly touched your cheek. 

“Who’s speaking right now?” You asked, staring into his eyes, “Hyungwon, my husband, or H.One the mafia leader?”

“My Love,” he threaded his fingers through your hair, “it’s me.”

You nodded briefly, closing your eyes again. “Go take a warm shower.”

“Join me.” He murmured. 

“Why?”

“Because I don’t want to leave you alone.”

“I’m not getting up.”

“Then I’ll carry you.” His arms slid under your body, lifting you up from the couch and cradling you to his chest. He carried you into the bathroom, setting you on the toilet as he turned on the shower. He helped you undress as you helped him. “You still have some of our clothes here, right?” 

“Yes. There’s still a couple of outfits left.” You answered, practically pushing him into the shower. 

“You’re so violent.” He chuckled, pulling you in with him. 

“You are too.” You countered, crossing your arms over your chest and jutting out your hip.

“Touché.” He appeased. 

“What brings you to my dwelling?” You asked, making sure he got most of the water on him. 

He sighed, putting his hand on your hip and bringing you closer to him. “I’m sorry Y/n.” He submitted, “I’m sorry I was so cruel to you. I was blinded by what your dad was trying to do. It’s not an excuse, I know.”

“Hyungwon,” you stopped him, “why were you so furious? You know nothing could happen unless we let it.” You put your hands on his chest. 

“He’s essentially recreating the trouble that happened with Youngjae. I’d never be able to forgive him for that.”

“So you did pick up on that.” You said, raising your eyebrows. 

“Of course I did. I pick up on everything.” He reached up and put his hands on your cheeks, gently holding your face. 

“You acted like you didn’t give a shit earlier.” You stared at the middle of his chest, not wanting to look at his face. 

He rubbed his thumbs along your cheeks, “I’m sorry Y/n. I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to make you feel that way.”

“I know,” You whispered, “thank you for that.” 

He gently made you look up at him, “I love you, Y/n.”

“I love you too, Hyungwon.” 

He crushed you against his body, hugging you tightly enough to make it hard to breathe. You put your ear against his heart, listening to its rapid beating. 

“Breathe babe,” you told him, “at this rate you’re going to get sick.”

“I am breathing.” 

“Are you?”

“Yes.”

“Calm your mind while you’re at it then.”

“I’m getting there.”

“I hope so.” 

You felt his lips press against the top of your head and smiled. “I think I might need a kiss to calm my mind.” He suggested. 

“Oh?” You moved to look at him. 

“Mhmm.” He nodded fervently. 

You shook your head at him, but still pressed a quick kiss to his lips. “Happy?”

“No. Wasn’t good enough.” He bent his head down, so that his lips were just a millimeter from yours. “I think I need more.”

You could feel his lips ghost yours as he spoke. “Mhmm.” You agreed, closing what little distance there was between you. 

He kissed you fervently, eagerly taking you in. Your arms wrapped around his neck, holding him close. You sighed against his lips, arching your back into him. Kissing him was a luxury, something you never thought could feel so good. 

He was warm against you, this shower having done its job. He pushed you up against the shower wall, taking you out of the water falling down. He deepened the kiss, eliciting a small, quiet moan from you. He smirked, running his hands up and down your sides. 

The kiss ended, much to your dismay. Hyungwon rested his forehead against yours, taking a moment to control his breathing. “Let’s get out, and get dressed. We’ll go get some hot chocolate then stay here for the night. We’ll have no interruptions, no arguments, no bad things. Just you and me, together. We’ll do whatever we want. We have a lost date to make up for.” He manifested. 

“Sounds amazing Babe.” You beamed.

**Author's Note:**

> Well y'all, sequel is finally here. Where will this go? We'll just have to wait and see so kick back and enjoy the ride


End file.
